A.R.M. (kinkyturtle) wrote,

Be Kind Rewind

Here's a bit of wordplay I'm surprised nobody came up with back when Windows NT was in use:
Without NT: USABLE

So, yesterday I saw "Be Kind Rewind", directed by Michel Gondry. Jack Black and Mos Def are two guys who work at a little hole-in-the-wall video store that still does VHS and has dwindling clientele. One day, Jack Black tries to sabotage a nearby power plant, becomes temporarily magnetized, and accidentally erases all the videos, so he and Mos Def decide to remake all the movies with a video camera and props made in the nearby junkyard. Of course nobody is fooled (they were originally trying to fool an old lady), but everybody thinks the "Sweded" movies are funny, so they want more, so the video store begins to make some actual money.

It's kinda dumb, but fun, and a nice sentimental tribute to the DIY ethic and the art of filmmaking. If you liked "The Science of Sleep" and can stand Jack Black, you might like this. Critics seem to hate this movie; I guess it's not for them.

But I'll tell ya this: "Be Kind Rewind" is Citizen Kane, Lawrence of Arabia and the Goddamn Godfather all rolled into one, next to an upcoming movie I was forced to sit through two separate commercials for (one in the "First Look" program that Edwards Cinemas shows instead of slides, one in the actual preview roll) called "Baby Mama".

Tina Fey is a yuppie who wants to be a mommy, and hires a surrogate mother (Amy Poehler) who lives with her for some reason and turns out to be a total slob and possible redneck. Imagine Oscar carrying Felix's baby. Now imagine hearing the word "baby" about 3 million times. Now imagine Siobhan Fallon as a birthing teacher who tawks wike Ewmer Fudd fow some weason. (Hey Hollywood, it's been DONE, by Peter Cook in "The Princess Bride".) Now don't try to imagine the "Is that chocolate or poop?" scene.

Instead, let me describe what is apparently the only even remotely funny scene. Tina Fey and Amy Poehler go to a nightclub, where Tina Fey happens to spot her apparently sleazy ex-boyfriend. As they're leaving, she happens to spot his car.

TINA FEY: (giggling) You know what we should do?
[AMY POEHLER smashes ex-boyfriend's rear windshield with a trash can.]
TINA FEY: (aghast) I was gonna say, "leave a funny note"!!

There, that's the only bit of actual entertainment to be wrung from this movie; I just saved you $10. (I hate that stupid Harry Potter shirt that says "Dumbledore dies, there, I just saved you $30", but in this case, THERE. I just saved you $10.) I dunno 'bout you, but I am gonna NOT SEE this movie so HARD, it's gonna wake up in the middle of the night going "Aaaagh!! Someone just didn't see the HELL outta me!"

There was also a preview for some sweaty macho fighting hitting kicking punching bonebreaking movie called Never Give Up or Never Back Out or Never Give Off or something. I forget; I was too busy noticing that someone needs to wash the movie's logo, because it's filthy, it's got some sort of brown crap smeared all over it. Is that chocolate or OK never mind forget it.

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