A.R.M. (kinkyturtle) wrote,

Walk Hard

Today I saw "Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story". It's a parody of those musician biopics whose directors hope to win Golden Globe awards by crafting achingly earnest encapsulated portraits of singers who've had hard lives, like "Ray" and "Walk the Line". You don't have to have seen those movies (I haven't, but I might eventually rent them or something), but it probably helps. It also helps to know stuff about other musicians such as Bob Dylan and Brian Wilson, Elvis, the Beatles, etc.

The movie is a lot of fun, if somewhat sophomoric in a laying-it-on-thick kinda way at times. It stars John C. Reilly as Dewey Cox, who starts the movie by flashing back to his childhood, when he accidentally chopped his brother in half with a machete, getting a guilt complex that lasts his whole life. Throughout the movie his dad hates him, exclaiming, "The wrong kid died!" every time he sees him. Other running gags include one of his bandmembers (Tim Meadows) accidentally turning Dewey on to various drugs, and Dewey's temper-tantrum habit of ripping bathroom sinks out of the wall in nearly every house he ever lives in. Dewey Cox goes from 14-year-old talent show contestant (already played by John C. Reilly!) to hot new rockabilly singing sensation to married man to lonely touring star to drugged-up out-of-control maniac to formerly drugged-up maniac in rehab. Oh yes, and in the '60s he starts writing Dylanesque protest songs about the plight of the midget. Then he tries to make an overproduced Brian-Wilson-style "masterpiece", gets put on a shamefully cheesy '70s variety show, and finally does a modern-day comeback concert.

There are also some bizarre cameos of real-life musicians, such as Elvis (Jack White), Buddy Holly (Frankie Muñiz), the Beatles (would you believe Jack Black as Paul McCartney?) Whoa, I just realized this movie has both Jack White and Jack Black. Huh.

It also has various binges of drinking, drugs and sex, Dewey almost inventing punk rock, oh yes and NUDITY!

Trailers I saw before the movie:
"Vantage Point", about a Presidential assassination (William Hurt (William Gunned Down And Killed, Even)), and a gov't agent (Dennis Quaid) tracking down eight eyewitnesses with different pieces of the puzzle. Looks intriguing. There's a twist. The President wasn't killed; a lookalike stand-in was, and now the real President's hands are tied. He can't issue any orders without giving away the subterfuge. This twist was given away in the trailer; I hope it was not supposed to be a surprise halfway through or whatever.

"Harold & Kumar 2". The guys from "Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle" are mistaken for terrorists on a flight to Amsterdam, arrested and taken to Guantanamo Bay, from which they escape and somehow manage to wind up skydiving into George W. Bush's vacation home. Looks kinda dumb.

"Meet the Spartans", an "Epic Movie"-style parody of "300", featuring as many mindless pop-culture references as the scriptwriters could cram in. How anxious are you to see King Leonidas kick a shaved Britney Spears (and her baby!) into the Pit of Death? Or an ancient Spartan Transformer robot that displays a screen showing that YouTube video of Chris Crocker crying? Looks really dumb.

Curious about whether the theatre had real butter on request as an alternative to that artificial crap (I hear some places do that), I asked a concession stand clerk. She pointed to the end of the counter where the artificial butter dispenser is and said "It's over there. I think it's real." So, no. Fortunately I've figured out how to sneak hot melted butter in (don't worry, it doesn't involve body heat; just a Thermos full of hot water).

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